Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I Didn't Die!

Hello again readers! I am so sorry for the long, long hiatus, and most especially for not giving much - if any - warning.

The last year has been in interesting and complicated time for me. I left you when I decided to leave college, and truth be told, I was headed for a major nervous breakdown. Things were happening in my personal life that felt as though I were fighting a tidal wave, and I had to unplug for a while.

I've spent a lot of time soul-searching and trying to find a sense of purpose. I tried working a minimal job just to say I was contributing to the household, but it didn't work out. My social anxiety has gotten to the point that, most days, I would rather not leave the house. I am also struggling with questions of self-worth because of my lack of financial contribution to my home.

If I am totally honest with myself, I prefer to be a housewife. I enjoy staying at home and being there when my son needs me, not leaving him with a babysitter or extended family all the time. I think it has given us both a chance to get to know each other more. I also like being able to write whenever I want; I've flung myself headfirst into my poetry and diary over the last year, and I've found it to be very fulfilling and therapeutic.

Speaking of therapy, I'm seeing a counselor for anxiety and depression. I haven't been going long, but I feel like it's helping. I like talking to someone about my feelings instead of just relying on medication.

So! With all that personal meandering out of the way, what is to become of my blog, and what are my prospects for the future? I am going to recommence Misadventures in the same vain as it always has been, but in the next several weeks I will be working putting together a new site that I will link to this one. Though playing the Great Rejection Game with literary magazines is thrilling and all that, I want to try a more 21st century approach. I plan on publishing some of my own work online, and seeing what sort of response I get. I value each and every one of your opinions, so please feel free to leave me criticisms and comments on this new blog. If all goes well, I may use it as leverage to publish a collection sometime in the vague future.

I'm hoping I haven't lost too many readers during my absence, and I look forward to writing again. Here's to being back from the dead!


  1. Hello again!

    If being a housewife works for you, that is great. My mum was a housewife right up until I finished high school, and she didn't do nothing, she helped us with homework, cleaned up after everyone else in the family, fixed the garden, etc. You don't have to feel guilty about it, you are making a big contribution to the family!

    Putting some of your work online sounds like a great idea, sometimes sharing it with others can be very encouraging. There are a lot of great writers out there who put their work online on blogs. I have considered doing it, but at the moment, I want to focus on planning a novel.

    1. Thank you, Laura!

      My therapist is helping me work out some of my guilt issues, but I'm still having a hard time. My own mother didn't work while I was little; she only started working when I was old enough to stay at home with my sister, but even then she worked as a substitute teacher at the school we attended so that she could be on our schedule.

      Good luck on the novel!

  2. I am so excited that you are back!

  3. We are programmed, almost from birth, to value our self-worth according to how much money we make and our financial contributions. The reality however, is that we're not all cut out to fit into that mindset. It might help to consider that the real problem lies with a singularly focused culture rather than you. I'd be willing to bet that one day your son will thank you for the valuable time that you spent with him. Because of it, he will likely, grow up much better adjusted and balanced because of your efforts. That's something to be proud of.

    Anyway, it's nice hearing from you again and I wish you the best in all your endeavors.

  4. I'm so glad you didn't die! I was just wondering about your blog the other day. Congrats on buying a house!

    1. I'm so glad I didn't loose people when I pulled my disappearing act.

  5. I'd only just started dropping by when you vanished. Anxiety gets the best of me to (indeed, my most recent blog posts have concerned that very subject). Strangely, though, it makes me write. I'm finishing up a novel (very slowly) and I'm lucky enough to work part time. It's amazing how guilty we can make ourselves feel for doing what is ultimately right for us. Best of luck in all that you do.

  6. Welcome back!

    You know, there is so much slagging on housewifes in modern feminism and modern family view in general, and I don't think it deserved at all. Being a housewife is a hard job. You are tending an abode (housekeeping), raising and entertaining your child (day care, perhaps teacher if you decide to homeschool), cooking (nutritionist and chef), and even (probably) helping manage finances (accounting). That is as much on your plate, if not more, than mine as an accountant to a hotel.

    Unless your a housewife who sits about in fancy night clothes, reading and eating bon bons all day. Then I'm just jealous. >^-^<

  7. I also suffer from anxiety from time to time, and have chosen to be a stay at home mum, to my cat, lol, and a painter. I am lucky to be able to be in a position to be able to do so, but I know well the feeling of guilt you talk about. We are programmed by society to feel our self worth through our jobs and financial contributions. But, there is more to life than work and money, although money is necessary, we need to know our self worth is not tied to a dollar value, but the quality of life we are able to create for ourselves and our loved ones.

    You are contributing to society by raising your boy in a happy and secure household where you are able to get some happiness yourself by being near him, taking care of him, and taking care of yourself by doing the things that are important to you.

    I look forward to reading some of your work in the future. Good luck and keep doing what you love Sarah :)